In last week's Hot Mess episode, Alix and Ashtin Earle open up about self-image, insecurities, and how they’ve built confidence despite societal pressures. I loved how raw and candid the sisters were when discussing their struggles with self-doubt—while also offering valuable insights on how they’ve learned to manage their insecurities in a healthy way, using many principles that are reinforced through conflict coaching.
Comparison Is the Thief of Joy
Alix and Ashtin are both incredibly beautiful, so it’s surprising to hear that, like many of us, they struggle with self-judgment. One relatable topic they discuss is comparing themselves to others. While sitting side by side, each sister criticizes their “bad side,” only for the other to quickly downplay the negativity. This leads to a key lesson they both agree on: comparison is the thief of joy.
Ashtin shares that her insecurities started young, likely from comparing herself to Alix or other girls on social media. She fondly describes herself as a “little meatball,” while Alix recalls feeling insecure as a child for being “too skinny.” Both sisters reflect on their past struggles with disordered eating, demonstrating how the desire to look like everyone else—rather than embracing individuality—can have lasting negative impacts.
Embrace Your Uniqueness
Both Alix and Ashtin stress that true self-acceptance and confidence come from within. Alix reminds listeners that beauty is about owning your quirks and flaws, while Ashtin highlights that personality plays a huge role in beauty, not just physical appearance. This serves as a powerful reminder not to get caught up in societal standards, but to focus on the beauty of self-acceptance.
Another point that really resonated with me is how Alix and Ashtin acknowledge the hypocrisy they sometimes feel in promoting self-love while still battling insecurities. Alix discusses how, even though she champions individuality and encourages others to embrace their uniqueness, she still struggles with self-critical thoughts about her own appearance. For instance, when Alix first started podcasting with cameras, she found herself overly critical of the right side of her face and even considered getting a nose job.
However, Alix is quick to point out that she has since grown more comfortable in her own skin and is less likely to let these fleeting insecurities dictate her actions. She also touches on her decision to get a boob job—something she felt deeply confident about doing for herself. Her story is a great example of how personal choices, even those related to appearance, should be made for the right reasons: self-confidence and authenticity, not societal expectations.
The Power of Self-Talk
I really appreciated Alix’s thoughts on the power of positive self-talk. She explains that confidence comes from within and sometimes it’s about shifting your mindset and focusing on how you feel in your body rather than how you look. Alix’s experience demonstrates that feeling good inside—through things like self-care, movement, and mental health practices—can have a powerful effect on your outward appearance and self-image.
Alix and Ashtin also show impressive emotional intelligence in how they handle criticism. Alix opens up about reading negative comments online and reflects on how she’s learned not to take them personally. She notes that she’s never claimed to be "the hottest thing ever" but rather a normal girl, which helps her brush off negativity.
This mindset of not taking things personally is a powerful tool for anyone. Instead of letting criticism define her, Alix focuses on not internalizing hurtful comments, which helps her maintain her sense of self-worth. This emotional resilience is something we can all apply when dealing with external judgments.
Final Thoughts
By the end of the episode, it’s clear that Alix and Ashtin are on a journey of self-acceptance, just like the rest of us. They’re learning and growing, and what stands out is their commitment to being real about the ups and downs of building confidence. They remind listeners that it’s okay to have insecurities, to struggle with self-image, and to change.
The episode is an insightful exploration of the complex relationship we have with our bodies and self-worth. Whether you’re struggling with comparison, body image, or confidence, Alix and Ashtin’s openness offers a comforting reminder that we’re all in this together. If you haven’t listened yet, be sure to check out Hot Mess with Alix Earle and let me know your takeaways from the episode!
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